Reputation vs Character

Proverbs 21:3 "To do justice and judgement is more acceptable to the Lord than sacrifice. "

"Reputation is what men and women think of us. Character is what God and angels know of us."

I have read many times, in the disclosure of a murderer, that they were initially described by family and friends as a "normal" person,  even "good" or "loving".  However, when their past was uncovered,  much more about their real character was revealed.  They had serious character flaws that were unknown.  Because of this,  these flaws had developed into major traits that doomed them.

A background check is required on many jobs today.  That is appreciated by the public and used for protection for us all.  However,  the character of a person isn't necessarily revealed in a background check.  Unfortunately,  it is often difficult to discern one's character until time or circumstance reveal it.

My character is the moral qualities that are unique to only me.  Only I know who the real "me" is.  So many things are filtered into what makes up my character. I want to have a good reputation. But I believe my reputation cannot long remain "good" if I am harboring self righteousness or pride within my heart.  I have been known to feel quite pleased with my ability to do good things.

The real background check came when I hired on with God. And he does updates on my character reference pretty often.  I realize that I have some flaws, that if left unchecked,  will certainly affect me down the road. I have also realized that to develop good character, I need a heart in tune with the Holy Spirit.

I read of the fruits of the "spirit" which I believe to be positive character traits. The outpouring of gentleness , goodness and love from my life has to come from my heart.  I am generous by nature, but I can't produce,  on my own, a selfless generosity that will bless others. I can see a need  and even minister to the need because that's who I am.  I have a reputation for that. However, this is not necessarily a good character trait.  I can easily  become proud of the fact  that I do this well.  I know how to make others like me.

My character is defined by why I am doing what I am doing.  God has to develop my character with traits that effectively work.  I can sacrifice and give and establish a pretty good reputation, but if it isn't channeled through the Holy Spirit, it is in vain. The Love Chapter says that I can give all I have to the poor, but if not done with God's love, it will profit me nothing.

To do good and establish good character doesn't always feel good. As an example,  I remember an instance when I felt like God was directing me to take flowers to an acquaintance that I knew didn't like me.  I was pretty sure I wouldn't be rewarded for doing it and I was more than a little fearful.  Following the prompting of the Holy Spirit, I set out, but, sure enough, this person let me have it and sent me out the back door with the flowers. I was embarrassed and even shed a few tears.  Years later, I was called to the bedside of this lady to witness her salvation. She and I became great friends!  God was developing my character through that circumstance.

I become emotionally exhausted when I try to maintain a reputation.  It's hard work to give and give without reward. Character building isn't  so difficult when I live under the guidance of the Holy Spirit. I feel so good when I don't have to worry about making everybody happy. I just let Him do all the detail work.